John Mc

This is a collection of my thoughts. Some of the thoughts that I once had, I no longer do. Some thoughts I have now I have never had. Yet none shal be discounted. This blog is soley for the enjoyment of the author and the readers. On occasion the views expressed are overly exagerated in order to prove a point. Also there may be a dirty word or thought in some of the posts. Grow up and take this for what it's worth - a blog that barely anyone will ever see.

5/20/2009

Pause

In light of new developments, it can be easy to forget what is important. A great deal of excitement, relief and joy was felt by majority of the nation when Drew put on his "new bling." A swarm of attention, once again, fell on the Chicagoland suburbs. Talk shows booked up. News sites had new stories and videos each hour. The developments were fascinating and consuming.
However, I encourage us all to pause from the bright lights for just a bit. Take a moment to pray for the families of those effected. Pray for the children who have been innocent victims of all of this for years. Perhaps even one for Drew and Joe that they see the light and come clean with what they know. One for Chrissy who STILL doesn't understand what she is involved with and needs professional help.
But, most of all, for the families of those effected by this.

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5/04/2009

Text Messaging

I just found the funniest site ever! A friend of mine, Amy, mentioned it in her facebook status and I had to check it out.
It is a collection of drunk texts.
That's it.
Hysterical and simple. What a great combination. You can submit your own and comment on other people's. The only identifying aspect to the texts is the area code that they came from. Some are funny, others just drunk texting. Here are some of my favorites so far:

(719): wanna go halves on a baby?

(312): I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk

(803): I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you

(312): awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
(708): Did someone propose they get off the stage?

(512): I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
(519): If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.

And my all time favorite:

(214): dude. I'm so drunk.
(972): pete, this is bryce's mom
(214): I can't wait to have my ______ in your ___
(972): pete, this is still bryce's mom

(I had to edit that last one. Contact me for the missing words. Both words are animals. Let's just say that it would work for Bryce or his mom.)

Do you have a funny text? Post it as a comment. Check out the website by clicking here.

Oh, one of my favorites that I have received actually comes from Chrissy's ex-boyfriend Mike when discussing her father on the CBS morning show. He wrote:

(630): I think her dad is border line retarded

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5/02/2009

DJ Thoughts

I hate DJing. I hate it.
As I drive to the warehouse to pick up the equipment I question why I have been doing this for a dozen years. I load up the equipment knowing that I'm meant for more than this pathetic physical labor. Why do I have an assistant if I'm doing all the heavy lifting?!
I then drive to the job with a disgust in my mouth. I'm too old for this. I am not keeping up on the new music. I don't want to do this. There is so much more going on tonight. The game is on. The party is about to begin. The gathering of friends that I rarely see will soon be assembling.
Yet, I'm on the road. I'm setting up the equipment. I'm starting boring-ass cocktail music during dinner.
I am not happy.
That is, until I press play for real. That is when the world changes. That is when I feel the pressure of the song ending before I know what to play next. This is before I encounter the stress of entertaining a crowd of people that I have never met, and that I will never meet again, for hours on end.
To find the perfect song to regain the trust that I lost earlier in the night. Or, better yet, to maintain the flow and growth of a memorable time for everyone involved. To create a set list. To know what I'm going to play five songs out - what a great sense of calm. To have a game plan. To have a logical AND emotional flow to the evening. Hoping that no one interrupts it with a stupid request.
I pray for the events that are filled with nothing but great requests. Songs that I know already work. Give me the "Brown Eyed Girls." Tell me of the "Y.M.C.A." Even sneak in the best song to get everyone out on the dancefloor - "Footloose" by Kenny Loggins. (Why does this work? I don't know. Loggins must be a musical genius.) Then mix in a sprinkling of "Oh, my God! I haven't heard this song in FOREVER!" as I play Bel Biv Divo's "Poison." Yeah, that's right. That girl is poison!
A good evening ends with me coated in sweat. Your guests have their arms around each other shouting out lyrics to a song they have heard a hundred times already. They form a positive emotional bond to it that they now associate with you. I have a full set list of songs that I wish that I could have played.
I want to hear "Man, you're the best I've ever seen." Or at least a "We had a great time tonight." without being prompted as we wrap up our cords and pack away our lights.
Then toss me that tip. Please don't make it $20 or a blank "thank you" card. That tells me that you know that you are supposed to tip, but are cheap. Give me one worthy of my time. 20% in the service industry is standard!
Let me know that you are glad that majority of your very special day (The day that you dreamed about since you were a little girl, the day that you planned for months or years, the day that assembled everyone important in your life) that was controlled by me, was worth while. That people celebrated. That they came together and rejoiced as one.
I did that. I pieced it together. I psychologically created a utopia of joy centered around you through the use of music. I labored. I stressed. I persevered over silence to fill the void with great immeasurable happiness.
I won. This is why I still DJ.
See you next Saturday.

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