John Mc

This is a collection of my thoughts. Some of the thoughts that I once had, I no longer do. Some thoughts I have now I have never had. Yet none shal be discounted. This blog is soley for the enjoyment of the author and the readers. On occasion the views expressed are overly exagerated in order to prove a point. Also there may be a dirty word or thought in some of the posts. Grow up and take this for what it's worth - a blog that barely anyone will ever see.


Tea Over Beer?!

Here are the weekly NFL picks:

CLE over STL
CHI over DET (Obviously. We need this one!)
IND over CAR (Even though My Favorite Marvin will be out of the game. Watch Wayne and Clark pick up the slack.)
NYG over MIA (This game is played in London to increase the popularity of the NFL over seas. Why give them two teams that even WE don't care about?! I just want to see them drinking tea instead of beer and asking why we would bother footing the bill for the Dolphin's tickets.)
TEN over OAK
MIN over PHI (This will be a great game. PHI will be coming off of a heartbreaking loss to DA BEARS last week and may be playing with a little more determination. Or they could have their spirits completely broken. We will see a few moments after kick-off which one it is and how the game will go.)
PIT over CIN
NYJ over BUF
SD over HOU
JAX over TB
SF over NO (This is my upset of the week. Why? I'm waiting for SF to do SOMETHING with their season! They looked so promising before week one!)
NE over WAS (They will continue their win streak. Why insult the Redskins this way?!)
DEN over GB (This will be a great Monday Night Game. The logic in me picks GB, but the Bear fan in me has to root for DEN. So, there we go.)

Enjoy football this week, Sports Fans! (Anyone else see "Scrubs" this week?!)


Thank You, Byron

No matter how hard life gets, we can all take solace in the fact that Byron Allen is still keeping it real.


Reasons To Take Up Reading Again

I am grateful for the DVR. This thing keeps me away from one of America's most disgusting qualities - daytime TV. I watch WGN News at Noon (Mainly because Nancy Loo on Fox is an idiot. I detest her personality greatly.) and then check out what my DVR has stored for me recently. Then I never have to worry about accidentally catching some of Springer or one of the 5,873 courtroom shows that they have on now.
I do like Jeopardy and on rare occasions, The Price Is Right. Family Feud is good as well. They now have it hosted by John O'Hurley. You may know him from his most famous role as J. Peterman on Seinfeld. (I heard recently that he eventually bought the Peterman company. But, that may not be correct.) But, he is now the host of Family Feud and from what I can tell from, it looks as if he may have gotten his start on Family Feud in 1985 during "Guys and Dolls Week."
It may be the times that I have checked out the Feud or it may be every day, but it seems that they put up a white family against a black family. What is going on here? I don't know who I'm rooting for. Should I pull for the white family because I can relate or the black family because I have "white guilt?" I think that Family Feud may be the true source of racial tension in America. Jessie should have a sit-down with O'Hurley.
If you are ever called to be on the Maury show, don't go. It is never a good move. You are either someone's baby's daddy, your kid is huge or someone that you made fun of in high school is now super hot. Or maybe all three if you made fun of a fat kid who is now attractive and you're the daddy.
Don't even get me started on the awful soaps!
I'm glad that thanks to the DVR, I don't have to endure these trials of American culture and can view something with a great deal more meaning. Like "America's Most Smartest Model."


NFL Picks

WAS over ARZ
NO over ATL
DAL over MIN (This will be a good game.)
NE will beat the hell out of MIA
NYG over SF
DET over TB (Should be an interesting game. Could go either way)
TEN over HOU (Again, see above.)
OAK over KC (Dispite Holmes being back! Might be the game of the week to watch just for that!)
CIN over NYJ
CHI over PHI (My upset game of the week. Isn't that sad, when it's my upset game?!)
SEA over STL
PIT over DEN
IND over JAX (This should be a GREAT Monday Night game. Will Indy be able to stay undefeated? This game could be risky for them!)

More posts soon!


Hi-Ho, Hi-Ho...

Very shortly here I will be leaving for work. I work at 4pm today. I have 35 minutes until I need to be there. I dread it. I dislike it. But, I know that many people dislike their job. They don't like to go to work, they don't even like driving to work. But, I bet you that majority of them would not like to trade places with me.
The temperature today does not make things any easier. It's windy and cold out with a chance of rain. What a remarkable day. Fall has come to Chicagoland and I want it to leave. Sure, the weekend will warm up again, but I will be working through majority of it.
I guess I would rather a 9-5 job. Something where my evenings and weekends were free. That would be ideal. To lead a real adult's life. Wow. It seems almost too much to ask!
That is why I'm in talks with several colleges in the area to try to become a professor there. I have the qualifications to do so in certain circumstances. I can't really go into great detail here, but it is a slight pipe-dream that I have.
Anything but waiting tables. I work with people who have no degree. Some may not even have a GED. People who have to stop and think to figure out how many sides are on a triangle. Now, not all the people I work with are like this, but the select few are aggravating. Perhaps that's why I drink the beer that I do! Although, I'm cutting down on that. I'm starting to develop an olympic-sized stomach from it.
I also find it humorous to have the people that feel that being a "Shift Leader" or the person in charge of making sure the restaurant is clean before people leaves, is an important decision. The mini-power trips they go on are silly. Their friends get little pats on the back. The person who said that one thing to so-and-so last week about who is dating who will have to do some extra work. And those in the "Shift Leader" positions feel that they don't have to do any work and take "delegation" to a whole new level. One person was so upset that I hadn't restocked the appetizer plates on the floor that they went up to me in front of customers and handed me a note with "AP PLATES!!!" in huge letters. I didn't do it because I was taking a drink order, dummy! You are a 36 year old man! Grow up and haul the ap plates out yourself if they upset you so much. My money and customers come before your power trip! Whatever. I'm just sick of the petty garbage from a select few immature persons there.
It's been a year in a job that I thought would be a place-filler. And I'm not happy. So, I'm doing something about it. Bitching about it doesn't solve anything. Resumes may.
Until then, it's off to work. Can't be late! Might be written up! We wouldn't want that, now would we?! Ugh.


Weddings... Thus Far

Warning! This is a long post. You may need some time to read it all. I was going to break it up into smaller bits, but I figured - what the hell.

As some of you may know, I DJ weddings on the weekends. This year's crop of weddings have come with the expected mishaps and mistakes. Aggravation and stress are a great part of this under-paid job. Before I begin, let me remind all of my readers (both of you) that a Wedding DJ is a part of the service industry. Thus, you are to TIP the Wedding DJ. Just as you would a waiter, valet, carpet cleaner, mover, etc. A tip is a part of the job. Have one ready. Also, remember who is crucial to the enjoyment of your reception. Does the food matter? Yes. The flowers? Perhaps. The DJ - OF COURSE. If the DJ is awful, then the reception is also awful. So, tip accordingly, cheap-asses!
Onto the adventures in tuxes.
One of the many weddings I DJed was at a playhouse theater in Joliet. A beautiful location with AWFUL acoustics. At least in the lobby. I'm sure that within the theater, the acoustics are incredible. However, in the marble-lined lobby, they are atrocious. NEVER get married there if you expect to have a great sounding wedding.
The bride and groom told us that we had to be set up by 4:30 to have everything in order before their ceremony started. I'm assuming that the God aspect of their wedding wasn't important, because they got married in the same room that their reception was held. Whatever. It isn't my wedding. I don't care.
What they didn't tell me was that the ceremony didn't begin until 5pm. So, the false 30 minute cushion that they gave was not relayed to me. So, I'm driving through Labor Day traffic on a Saturday afternoon through an intense mall situation to get to their location on time. I get there with about 14 minutes to set everything up and be in my tux. Surely this is all the time I need. We throw everything together and have about 30 seconds to spare to find out that we did have a little more time available to us. TEN TIMES more time. To say that I was slightly aggravated right off the bat would be an understatement.
So, I decided that I needed something to drink and something to drink right away. Non-alcoholic, mind you, because I had been dripping sweat trying to get everything up and ready in such a short window of time. The only place that we could find was a chicken shop about a mile down the road. Considering that the wedding ceremony was going to be taking place, we decided that we had A LOT of time to kill before we needed to be back.
So, I had some chicken and a large soda and then I passed the time making phone calls that I had been putting off. Not intentionally, mind you, but calls that I hadn't had the opportunity to make because I had been so busy the past few days with work.
So, we hike back to the venue to see the guests milling around while the staff was moving the ceremony stuff out of the room to make way for the tables for dinner. At this point we didn't realize what had happened while we were gone. It seems that they had a wedding coordinator on the premises. This is always a BIG mistake. It may seem like a time-saver for the bride and groom to have someone there to make all the decisions for them so that they can sit back and enjoy everything, but instead a wedding coordinator is nothing but a pain in the ass. These are the people who try to tell me what to play, when to play it and how it should be done. They are wrong 99% of the time and only create stress and hassle on the most important day of your life. It is NEVER a good idea to have one of these control freaks take the reins of your wedding. I normally tell them to get lost. Before my aspect of the evening even began, the bride had apparently taken care of this task for me.
I soon asked one of the relatives how the ceremony had gone. Mainly just to make conversation and familiarize myself in the eyes of the people that I would be entertaining. They informed me that the ceremony had gone a little bit wrong. It seems that when the bride was supposed to be walked down the aisle, her father had to make a bathroom break. In haste, the wedding coordinator said "Go. Just go." The bride being stressed and freaked out, went.
Before I even MEET her, she is now beyond upset with the wedding coordinator and her father. GREAT. I have overcome great odds with wedding couples in my ten years of DJing weddings, but this was a whole new ballgame. I searched for her to get a first-hand feeling for where she and her husband were at and what their emotional state was like. They were nowhere to be found. I walked the halls of that entire location and couldn't find them. Where were they? Outside taking pictures with the photographer.
This is to be expected. Right after most weddings, the photographer monopolizes the bride and grooms' time taking pictures while the sun is still up. I'm ok with this. Well, I'm ok with it up until the hall is breathing down my neck to get the announcements out of the way so they are able to serve dinner on time. When you are cooking for 200 people, there is a small window when everything can go out and go out perfectly. This window was closing on them.
So, I made the announcement for all the bridal party to meet upstairs so that we can announce them. My DJ boot was on the first floor just to the left of the head table. There were two large stair cases that started on either side of us that went upstairs to a balcony above us. The bridal party was going to meet us upstairs and then walk down once they were announced. The bride wanted the whole bridal party to come down and wrap around her cake so that they would be there when they walked down and went to cut their cake. What she DIDN'T think about was that this created a logistical nightmare for the photographer to get a good shot, at all angles, of them cutting their cake. Whatever. I don't care.
So, I make the announcement and begin heading upstairs so that I can get everyone lined up. I'm stopped by a skinny balding man. He asks me "What do you think you're doing?!" I am puzzled. I let him know that I'm about to get everyone lined up so that we can get things underway. He turns to square his shoulders with me and glares his beady little eyes at me and says "Well, I'm the photographer and I was taking a picture of the bride and groom with their God Parents and you just ruined the shot because they had to get 'LINED UP.' Now I'm going to have to get that shot later in the evening!" I re-assured him that I think they will all be present after dinner and he would have his opportunity later. He didn't care for that too much, but stormed off to get in position for the bridal party to come down the stairs.
This was the first time that I had the opportunity to talk to the bride. I asked her how things were and got a stoic response from her. Like a manikin in J.C. Penny she just smiled and said "Fine." I told her that I had 10 years experience and that I can roll with any and all punches. I'm going to make things great from here on out. Essentially, I tossed her every line that I had to calm her down. She relaxed a bit. I got a look from the groom of gratitude and lined everyone up.
I then notified those giving toasts to speak directly into the mic. To not face the speakers for fear of feedback and to enunciate what they had to say. I told this to the Best Man, the Maid of Honor and to the Father of the Bride who were all giving a toast. Did they listen? Well, one out of the three did.
I'm pretty sure that everyone there was waiting to hear that the Father of the Bride had to say. To see if he would make up for a mistake that wasn't entirely his own, but still shouldered blame from his daughter. What did he do instead of making up for it? Talked into the speakers. An incredible amount of feedback came over the system. So much so that I ran up to him in the middle of his toast and told him DON'T FACE THE SPEAKERS!!! He then put the mic down to his waist and asked "How do I not face the speakers?!" This question is one that need not be asked. It isn't that difficult. The way you don't face the speakers is by NOT FACING THE DAMN SPEAKERS!!! I never thought I would have to explain this to someone, but apparently Mr. Small Bladder needed a diagram drawn out for him.
After all of that, things got better, right? Wrong. We finished dinner, had the first dances and then I couldn't find the bride or groom. They were nowhere to be found. Guess where they went? If you said "with the photographer for pictures," you get 15 bonus points.
But, again, this is expected. After the first dances, there may be some family pictures that need to be taken or some last minute bridal party photos, things like this. About 15 minutes or even a half hour for really behind photographers may be necessary after the first dances. So, I gave him his 15 minutes. And soon his 20 and 25 minutes. Finally, I went back to his back-drop where the entire bridal party was assembled and asked him how much longer things would be. For, at that point, I had been playing a great deal of crap songs to keep people on the floor while I waited for the bride and groom to be back out there to do some of the activities that they had asked me to do.
He told me that he only needed them back there for another 10 minutes or so. I smiled and didn't say anything I shouldn't have. I just said "Ok. Thanks, man. We have a lot to get to tonight. Stuff that you are going to want photos of!" Trying my hardest to bite my tongue and just go with the flow.
I also got a quick look at the bride. She had gone back into stoic mode. While there was a big plastic smile on her face, she might as well had been catatonic. Let me stress again, with so many variables that go into your wedding day, SOMETHING is going to go wrong. Now, she did have a BIG error occur to her, but you must still realize that even though something went wrong, it isn't the end of your wedding day. As a matter of fact, your wedding day is STILL GOING ON. Enjoy as much of it as possible. You may need to table an issue or slide it under the rug to do so, but DO IT! Don't dwell on an error that lasted a few minutes that could ruin the last few hours of your celebration.
She didn't get that. I had done all that I could at that point to get her back to life. I would attempt to help her out a few more times in the evening, but with no avail. So, I returned to the booth and switched up the music to some of the guest requests. I figured, they are the only ones left in the room, might as well play for them, right?
After about an hour of dancing without the bride or groom anywhere to be found, they finally made an appearance on the dance floor. To dance to about half a song before the photographer asked them to step outside. Now my aspect of things is piling up. I have so much stuff that I need to cram into the last half of the evening that it is going to look and feel awful. I told my assistant to go out and find them to bring them back in here for the bouquet and garter toss. He found them outside BESIDE the theater, in the alley, taking pictures next to the dumpsters.
I can't imagine many brides or grooms asking for this unless one of them is a garbage man or something, but that's were they were. We were given our standard response of only 10 or 15 more minutes.
At this point, I had just about given up caring. The crowd there was not the greatest. It was taking me forever to get them going on the dance floor. The booze that they were downing was helping. (It always does. NEVER have a dry wedding. They USUALLY suck. 95% of the time it is a snore fest.) Finally I'm able to get everyone out on the dance floor and it is packed. Everyone having a great time dancing to "Footloose." My assistant is amazed that "Footloose" worked as well as it did. I reminded him that "Kenny Loggins is a GENIUS." I then turn back to the dance floor to see half of the people gone immediately. It was as if they were beamed up somewhere. Which is partially true. They were beamed halfway up the stairs of one of the stair cases for a picture with the bride and groom.
This continued for the next half hour. Random groups of people were hustled up the stairs for photos. God forbid they have a good time.
I finally went up to the bride and said "If we don't do the bouquet and garter toss soon, we won't be able to do it at all." It was 11:30 before I could get a break in the pictures to get that out of the way. That was the ONLY thing that I can recall doing with the bride and groom. Right after that their limo, that was going to take them to their hotel later, pulled up and they went outside to take pictures in front of it. The rest of the bridal party followed.
So, that is ONE of the weddings that I had to endure this season. I think my assistant said it best while we were packing up: "Worst wedding EVER!" It wasn't, but at that moment, it felt like it.
That was the first time that I had ever heard of the bride not walking down with her father. The next wedding I had never experienced THIS before:
I was at some sort of horse club out in the sticks. The bride and groom let me know that they were going to have their cake cutting right after salad. No problem. That is a standard place for people to put their cake cutting. What they did, however, was put all the "help," the DJs, photographer and videographer in a separate room for dinner. This is rather insulting to get a partially frozen sandwich that was made the day before while the rest of the room eats fillet mignon. But, whatever. It happens. While I'm chowing down on my gourmet meal, I'm watching the staff serve soup. Then comes the main course. I'm now thinking, I have missed the salads and the bride and groom are going to be rather upset with me that I didn't go out there to get their cake cutting under way. I start walking into the other room as the groom was walking my way. I'm expecting him to give it to me. Instead he stops at the group of waiters assembled in our paths. I hear him ask them "What happened to the salads." However, he didn't put it as nicely as that. They looked confused and embarrassed, so I pulled a 180 and went back to my table to avoid any collateral damage that might head my way. Because some of the guests had been served their main course already, there was no turning back now.
At another wedding, the bride and groom had a song for EVERYTHING! They had a song for their cake cutting, a song for their parents to dance to, a song to end the evening a song for when the clock read 10:34. A song for EVERYTHING. They might as well of made a CD and hit play at the beginning of the evening instead of hiring a professional that would play the best song for the crowd ad the best possible time. I also had to do their ceremony music. It is RARE that I have to do this, so it is a HUGE stress on me to make things go perfectly for the most important aspect of the evening. I focused heavily on that to make sure things went flawlessly. Perhaps it is because my focus was taken away by making sure things went well in that venue that I made a mistake and didn't play their song for their cake cutting. I played a different one. They got hot under the collar and I told them that I would play it later in the evening. They told me not to bother because it had been ruined. The ONLY time that their song would have fit, according to them, is during the cake cutting. The groom came up to me halfway through the evening and let me know that perhaps the end of the evening would work out just as well for their cake cutting song. It is some song done by a Hawaiian guy on a ukulele that combined "Wonderful World" by Louie Armstrong with "Over The Rainbow" from The Wizard of Oz. It worked like a charm. Everyone got in a big circle and sang along with the song as the bride and groom danced in the middle. The bride, with tears running down her face, let me know once it was over that it worked out better than she imagined. I let her know that I do what I can to make things perfect for her. She cried even more. Until she wrote a letter to my boss saying that had I talked to her in the week prior to her wedding that maybe I wouldn't have missed their cake cutting song. What she left out was the part where when I introduced myself I said "Hello, I'm John. I left you the voice mail on Wednesday letting you know that I'd be your DJ." I also let her know in that voice mail that she could call me with any special instructions, changes or concerns she may have had. Bitch.
We have the opportunity to play a song important to the bride and groom while they have pictures of them growing up and then pictures of them together during their courtship play on TV screens. This is not a unique aspect of our company, and I'm sure that you've seen it done before. What you may not have ever seen is the behind-the-scenes panic that the DJ will sometimes have to go through to get this accomplished.
I was DJing at a museum. (Yes, I know, I get all the weird-ass weddings. It almost seems rare that I DJ at a hotel or banquet hall.) The cocktail hour and the dancing was in one room and the dinner was in another. This posed an issue. To have the bridal party introduced, I would need two systems or to wheel my main system into the dinner room to have the music and the mic in order to do this. Luckily the museum had a microphone in the other room attached to a rudimentary sound system. This system also had a CD player, which is nice, but all of my music is on computer. Plus, when I set up the TV's and the DVD player for their video presentation, the DVD player that I was given didn't have a remote. There was no way for me to select the chapter necessary for me to play their presentation. So, I called our tech guy. I let him know the situation and let him know that he had through the remainder of the cocktail hour and dinner to fix this problem. Also, I let him know what the two songs were that I needed for the introductions.
He told me that there was a chance that he wouldn't have time to get to the location to give me the CD of intro songs, but that he would be there with a fix for the DVD player. I let the bride and groom know that because there were two rooms that I may not be able to get the intro songs going, but that I had our Sr. Tech guy running to the office to burn a CD and rushing out to the venue, but he may not make it in time. They shrugged and said essentially "Do what you can do." I like these kinds of couples. They realize that not everything will be perfect.
Luckily the tech got there with the CD in time for me to do the announcements. However, in his haste, he brought a VCR instead of a DVD player out to the location. He fiddled with the DVD player a little to see if it was user error that prevented their presentation from playing and then decided to get a new DVD player. The original one was so old and generic, I think it just said "DVD Player" on the front of it.
The intros went well and the bride and groom never found out that we had to swap out their DVD player while they dined on stuffed chicken in order to get their presentation up and running flawlessly.
Every other wedding that I have done this season has gone well, Thank God! The errors were few to none and everyone had a good time. Including me, sometimes. The mantra that I developed long ago has helped me through many of the ones that I have had to deal with. It is "It isn't my wedding." You may have assembled all of your family, closest relatives, and people you hold dear in your life, for a day that you may have dreamed about since you were a child. You may have put together a day that you'll remember for the rest of your life. But, to me, it's Saturday. And if this one doesn't go well, I will have another one next week.


More Stuff Soon!!!

Sometime in the next few days expect more "unwritten rules." (I'm waiting until I come up with 10 of 'em. (I know that I have, I just haven't been around a pen and paper when the remaining 4 have come to me.) Also, I'm deciding how much to write about Disney. Not for legal reasons, but for who I want to see it. Perhaps I will do two. One for here and another "nicer version." My other concern is that majority of the pictures are just pictures of my family and I don't really think that most people would find that interesting and they might not want to be on a public blog. So, there lies in the biggest concern. However, I do realize that I have to post that before I start forgetting details. My memory is crap as of recently.
I also have some great stories from the weddings that I have DJed this summer. I will put them all together in one large post. If you or someone you know is about to get married, please remind them that with all the details and variables that go into something like a wedding - expect SOMETHING to go wrong. I pray each Saturday that I won't be responsible for that one thing!
I also have assembled the pictures to go along with my yearly sports challenge of this year. That post is also in the works.
I will be more pro-active with this blog for all of my faithful readers. Both of you. Essentially, A LOT is about to be posted. Perhaps even multiple posts in a day. So, keep coming back for more interesting stuff. Or at least, more stuff.

Post Secret

I am pretty sure that I have mentioned Post Secret before. It is a blog dedicated to people sending in home-made post cards about their inner most thoughts and/or secrets. Once a week, it is re-vamped and a whole new crop of post cards are put up. It is rare that I check it out, but I find it amazing to look at. Every time there is at least one that I can relate to. This week it is this one:

I totally do that when I'm putting away my clothes. Better clothes get the better hangers. Then the second tier gets the wire hangers. Then the floor and finally the drawers that I never go in unless it has been a LONG day since laundry day.
Unfortunately I'm only able to wear white or black t-shirts to work, so this has altered my tiered system by bumping up clothes based on their color instead of their character. MLK would be very upset with me.
I encourage you to check it out. Click on the post card for a direct link to it.
Oh, and they have been featured in the video for "Dirty Little Secret" by "My Chemical Romance?" I may have the band incorrect, but that is the song.


Random Thoughts... Again.

Kid Jeopardy was on TV last week. I love Kid Jeopardy week. It is the one week that I feel Super Smart. Normally I am impressed when I get most of the questions correct. When Kid Jeopardy week is going on, I clean up. "What month hosts our nation's birthday?" "What is July. I'm a genius." If I ever have to compete against 10 year olds in a battle of intelligence, I feel fairly confident in my victory. (Oh, and Alex - grow the mustache back!)
They say that while in school, you are the smartest that you will probably ever be. Thus, college students should be the smartest people we have in our country. Why is it that they seem to be the dumbest? So naive about the world. I would like to think that I have retained a great deal from my years of schooling. Such as the mitochondria are the "power houses" of the cell. EVERY biology teacher I have had used that analogy. Whoever came up with that one should have put a copyright on that saying. I'm assuming it was either Watson or Crick.
I just came back from a trip to Orlando to visit one of my oldest friends, Mickey. (He is doing well, in case you were wondering. He hasn't aged a bit. Must have that Dick Clark gene where you don't age for decades.)
It was there that I saw a few people with the "funny t-shirts" that most people are wearing today. However, they weren't up to the caliber that I've seen in Chicago. I don't know if this means that we have a greater sense of humor up here (thus Second City) or if the people I ran into were just lame.
I saw one guy with a shirt that read "Gr8 In Bed." First of all, the play on the number 8, not that creative. Second of all - Disney World? You are going to wear this to Disney World? I'm sure that is going to impress the hell out of the 10 year old waiting in line for Dumbo. However, it may be on his humor level at that age. And finally, he probably bought that shirt for himself making it extremely pathetic. If his wife and/or girlfriend bought that for him, it would have been better. But, still not good apparel for Disney World.
Disney has completely sold out. EVERYTHING there was sponsored. The ride known as "Test Track" is the "GM Test Track." Everywhere you look there is a GM logo. There is even a GM SHOWROOM at the end of the ride. There is a gift shop at the end of each ride. What is even sicker, companies have even sponsored stupid made-up things. There is a sign in the bathroom under the mirror that has "Hand Washing Suggestions." I'm not making this up. "Wet hands, lather with soap completely and then rinse. These hand washing suggestions are brought to you by Bounty Paper Towels." They have sponsored hand washing. What's next? Wiping?
Has anyone else noticed that the hand washing in public bathrooms has gotten worse? It used to be the occasional sicko that avoided this step, now it seems like a close majority do. I realize with guys there is no contact with what is being released, but there is still some evidence of what has happened. Perhaps microscopic, but come on! I have heard that urine is sterile, but I still don't want it in the mixed nuts on the bar.
Avoid the mixed nuts on the bar. They are FILTHY!
Oh, and no transition here, Gore got the Peace Prize? WTF?! This is truly the beginning of the end of salvation. Is Dennis Kucinich going to give up the location of his pot o' gold? Is Nancy Pelosi going to do SOMETHING positive with the Democratic-Run congress? What other absurdities could possibly occur?! And what did he win it for? A movie that made less sense than "Scary Movie 2!" A movie that has been discredited time and time again. And a world view that makes no sense. Anyone else notice that he hasn't had any public discussions about this with those that oppose Global Warming theories? Not one. Why? (Click here to read a post that details my options and why I'm right.)
I really hope he runs for president again. Just so we can see him lose again and then get fatter.
That's it for now. Go Bears.

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NFL Picks

I have a feeling about this week. Something(s) strange and/or big is/are going to happen. What? Not sure. However, I could be completely wrong and everything goes as planned.
In any event, here's how your Sunday and Monday are going to shape up.

STL over AR (This is my upset of the week. We'll see if it pans out)
TEN over ATL
CAR over NO (Alright, another upset!)
NE over CLE
DET over WAS (One more? Maybe this is the feeling I'm having.)
KC over JAX
HOU over MIA (Who cares?)
NYG over NYJ
PIT over SEA
IND over TB (This would be one helluva upset if reversed!)
BAL over SF (Only due to BAL's defence, nothing else.)
DEN over SD (Another upset. DEN is a little beat up this season, but SD isn't ready to start a winning streak just yet.)
DAL will beat the hell outta BUF on Monday Night.
and finally,
CHI over GB (Any question with this one? The biggest game of the season will put a little more fuel in Chicago's tank and knock over evil Packers. Enjoy this game tonight and cheer for the good guys to defeat the forces of Satan.)

I guess this will be the week of upsets (Like week two was for me) Sorry to everyone who was awaiting my week four picks. Hopefully the accuracy of my week five picks will make up for it.
Enjoy, Football fans!!!